A heart-warming Christmas story

Not long ago and far away, Santa was getting ready for his annual trip, but there were problems everywhere. Four of his elves got sick and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the sick elves. Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule.

Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mum was going to come and visit. This obviously stressed Santa even more.

When he went to harness the reindeer, he found out that three of them were about to give birth (go on Rudolph!!!) and two had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where. More stress.

Then he began to load his sleigh, when one of the boards cracked and the toy bag fell to the floor and scattered the toys everywhere.

Totally frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of tea and a shot of sherry. When he went to the cupboard, he found the elves had drunk all his liquor and there was nothing left to drink. In his frustration, he dropped his tea pot and it shattered into a million pieces and all over the kitchen floor. He got his broom to sweep all the bits up only to find that mice had eaten the straw off the end of the broom.

Just then the door bell rang and Santa cussed on his way to the door.

He opened the door to see a little angel with a great big Christmas tree.

The angel said, in a sweet little voice, "Where would you like me to put this tree fat man?"

And that my friends, is how the little angel came to be on top of the Christmas tree.

I Live in a World Obsessed With Looks...

I walk a very fine line with the things I am about to say yet, they are my personal convictions and this is my statement, my stand.

I live in a world that is obsessed with looks. There are so many ads about weight lost, perfect skin/hair/teeth, how to achieve the perfect look and I am surrounded with them daily in magazines, in books, in movies and on TV.

I live in a world that is obsessed about love. The kind of love shown on TV and sung in love songs, where you meet someone you find physically attractive and go on a few dates with them and then you “move on to the next one” or "fall in love" and get married and live happily until divorce or separation due to some minor incompatibility or the lost of that physical pull.

I live in a world obsessed with money. The biggest, best, newest things that money can buy. Living in luxury or living a comfortable life. Being at the top of the ladder. Being well off. Being in control of your finances. Being financially stable.

I live in a world obsessed with self.

I can obsess about my looks, I can dress fashionably or change my body to look a certain way, but what use is that when I die and the worms eat away the flesh? If I see my spiritual self now, how would it look? Would I be buff? Would I be healthy? God gave me this physical body and I should take care of it, and I want to be physically healthy and I want to live a physically healthy life, but I am convinced that if I cannot take care of my spiritual life with the same zeal as I want to take care of my physical self then it is all in vain. If I exercise every day but do not read the word and study the word every day, then what does it matter? I become a person who does not know what to do with the beauty that was sculptured, I become aimless. The physical that I created becomes useless to what really matters.

I can obsess about finding the perfect fit, the person that gives me all the goose bumps and butterflies or has the stable life and can support me. That can become my goal and I can be disappointed over and over again when no one fits that pedestal.

Love is patient and kind. It does not envy, does not boast and is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered and it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. Love never fails. This is real love, if I cannot have this, then anything else is fake (a poor imitation) and I might as well just be an empty barrel tumbling down a hill making a racket.

I am convinced that if I cannot love my fellow man - if I cannot love myself - this way then I will never be truly satisfied when it comes to love. I am convinced that if a majority of my efforts is just focused on finding Mr. Right then I am missing out on the things that life has to offer right now.

I can obsess about my finances. I can try to get rich and say that I will give to the poor, but if I cannot give with the little I have now, how much more will I give when I have more? What use is it to build up treasures on earth that can be here today and gone tomorrow when my treasure chest in heaven is empty?

I suppose in the end my convictions is based on just one thing - eternity. Is what I am doing now useful for eternity? I am not saying that I shouldn't take care of myself, that I shouldn’t get married, that I shouldn't work, I am only saying that these should never overshadow the spiritual aspect of my life and that is, that Jesus died for me and has a purpose for my life and that I should really work hard towards that purpose because I do not know how much longer my place is secured on Earth.

In the end it comes down to me not being obsessed about self, if my affections can be set first on spiritual things, then these other things will fall into a happy medium that is just right for me.

Do you ever feel like the things of this world overshadow the spiritual aspect of your life? How do you keep things in an eternal perspective?

My understanding of love

With my month of December already containing 4 weddings, two engagements, several beginning "serious" relationships, one messy divorce, and the most important birthday in the world, I cannot help but have been giving some thought to love.

From what I have gone through, from my experiences, my understanding of Love is different from what many people would think.

I have loved. I have been loved. I have spurned, I have been spurned. I have given and I have taken. I have had the rush of endorphins and hormones that give the feeling of love, and I have had that rush fade leaving nothing more than logic and understanding.

Love to me is part commitment, it is the choice to love, despite the storm of emotions, despite the tides of feeling. Feelings come and go, but love remains constant. but committed love is consistent love, it neither grows nor fades by itself.

Love is part practice. I do not mean that it is loving one person after another so one could say "I loved Susie, I loved Rachel, I loved Veronica, I loved Betty, and now I love _________." Practiced love is the attempt to put love into action. Practiced love is showing love, its giving love away with nothing expected in return. The thing about practiced love is that it returns to the one who is practicing it. Practiced love is for everyone you meet though. It is not just for that one special person, although that is just as important. It is to be used to help everyone around you, every soul that crosses your path, every person you see. It has no barriers, it worries not about race, color, social status or position, gender, religion, even sexual orientation.

You cannot grow in love until you give it away. The more you give it away, the more people you are able to help and to show love to, the more it returns to you.

Love is part cherishing and nurturing. Love desires nothing more than what is best for the other person and will provide it in any way possible. Love is holding them so dear that even when they are wrong and doing something stupid, you are willing to take the heat and the anger and the wrath to prevent them. Love is forgetting about self and being fully involved with the other person. When someone can not let go of self, they cannot practice love. When someone cannot practice love constantly, they cannot make the choices and commitments love requires.

Love is enduring. Love is scorned. Real love is laughed at and ignored. Real love only has a few people ever return even a smidgen of it back. To truly love is to continue on loving despite the hinderances, the refusals and the rejections. Love continues to love someone even when they would rather hate you. love means letting them hate you. Real love is always misunderstood. To be truly loving is to care not a whit about what is returned to you. True love is alone.

What does love mean to you?

Story from Iraq

BAGHDAD – Spotting irregularities is a tactic that is drilled into the minds of Multi-National Division – Baghdad Soldiers throughout training and in practice while in Iraq.

Soldiers recently watched as a car pulled up to an entry control point at Forward Operating Base Callahan in northern Baghdad. They continued to watch as a woman stepped out of the car holding a bag. Once the woman dropped the bag near the gate, internal alarms were ringing and a careful search was called for and conducted...

...That search yielded a newborn baby wrapped tightly in several cloths. Soldiers raced to the bag, retrieved the child and brought him to the aid station to be examined.

“We unwrapped it to make sure he was alive – and he wasn’t sick, he wasn’t dead, he wasn’t injured,” said Staff Sgt. Paul Briscoe, the aid station non-commissioned officer in charge at FOB Callahan. “He was a perfectly healthy baby. I’m guessing three to seven days old. He was in perfect health. There wasn’t a scratch on him.”

This unlikely sight brought images of the Las Vegas native’s two children to mind.

“It was like my kids were newborns again,” said Briscoe, who serves with Headquarters and Headquarters Company, 1st Combined Arms Battalion, 68th Armor Regiment, 3rd Brigade Combat Team, 4th Infantry Division, Multi-National Division – Baghdad.

After the medics were satisfied the baby, who by this time had drawn the nickname “Alex Callahan” after the Soldier who found him and the name of the base, was in no need of immediate medical attention, the focus shifted to what they would do with the child.

An interpreter working at the base volunteered to go to a nearby store to buy diapers and formula while another interpreter took care of Alex. Briscoe said the aid station became a hub of activity as word spread throughout the small base of the new arrival.

“I’ve fed him twice, just holding him, watching him, making sure that he’s alright,” said Doreen Haddad, an interpreter with 1-68 AR, who helped care for Alex. “I’ve changed his diapers twice. I wanted to give him a bath, but I wasn’t able to.”

While a forward operating base isn’t the ideal location for a baby, Soldiers and those working at FOB Callahan ensured that Alex’s stay there was as comfortable as possible.

The baby is to be adopted by the brother of a local national, who works at the base. The brother, and his wife, have been married five years and have been unable to have a baby of their own. The interpreters at FOB Callahan have taken a collection to donate to the family to help care for the baby.

Despite the thousands of miles that separates the Soldiers from their families in Colorado, one constant remains with this baby and those they left behind.

“He’s sleeping and pooping – just like a regular baby,” Briscoe said.

Don't wait till tomorrow

It all started when I was 6 years old. While I was playing outside of our house, I met a boy. He was an average kind of boy who teased you and then you chased them and beat them up. After that first meeting in which I beat him up we kept on meeting and beating each other up at the fence. That only lasted for a little while though. We would meet at the fence all the time and we were always together. I would tell him all my secrets. He was quite very quiet he would just listen to what I had to say. I found him easy to talk to and I could talk to him about everything. In school we had separate friends but when we got home we would always talk about what happened in school. One day I said to him that a guy I liked hurt me and broke my heart. He just comforted me and said everything would be okay. He gave me words of encouragement and helped me get over him. I was happy and thought of him as a real friend. But I knew that there was something else about him that I liked. I thought of it that night and figured it was just a friend kinda thing that I was feeling. All through high school and even through graduation we're always together and of course I thought of it as being friends. But I knew deep inside that I really felt differently. On graduation night even though we had different dates to the prom I wanted to be with him. That night after everybody went home I went to his house and wanted to tell him that I wanted to see him. Well, that night was my big chance and all I did was just sit there with him watching the stars and talking about what I was going to do and what he was going to do. I looked into his eyes and listened to him talk about what his dream was. How he wanted to get married and settle down. He said how he wanted to be rich and successful. All I could do was to tell him my dream and cuddle next to him. I went home hurting because I didn't tell him how I was feeling.
I wanted to tell him so bad that I loved him but I was too scared and frightened. I let my feelings go and told myself that someday I would tell him just how I felt. All through college I wanted to tell him but he always had someone with him. After graduation he got a job in City X, I was happy for him but at the same time I was sad to see him go. I was sad also because I didn't tell him how I felt. But I couldn't let him know now that he was leaving for his big job. So I just kept it to myself and watched him go on the plane. I cried as I hugged him for what I felt was going to be the last time. I went home that night and cried my eyes out. I felt hurt that I didn't tell him what I had inside my heart. Well, I got a job as a secretary and then worked my way to a computer analyst. I was proud of what I had accomplished. One day I got a letter with an invitation to a marriage. It was from him, I was happy and sad at the same time. Now I know that I could never be with him and that we could only be friends. I went to the wedding the next month. It was a big occasion. The big church wedding and the reception at the hotel.

I met the bride and of course him. I fell in love one more time. But I held back so it wouldn't spoil what should be the happiest day in his life. I tried to have fun that night but it was killing me inside watching him being so happy and me trying to be happy covering up my sadness tears inside of me. I left City X feeling that I did the right thing. Before I left on the flight, he came running out of nowhere and said his good-byes and how he was very happy to see me. I came home and just tried to forget about what went on in City X. I had to go on with my life. As the years went on, we wrote to each other on what was going on and how he had missed talking to me. On one occasion he never wrote back to me at all. I was getting worried as to why he hadn't written anything for a long time after I had already written 6 letters to him. Well, just when everything seemed hopeless and sad in my life, I got a note that said: "meet me at the fence where we used to talk about things". I went and saw him there. I was happy to see him, but he was broken-hearted and sad inside. We hugged until we couldn't breathe anymore. Then he told me about the divorce and why he hadn't written for a long time. He cried until he couldn't cry anymore. Finally, we went back to the house and talked and laughed about what I had been going and to catch up on old times. But in all of this, I couldn't tell him how I felt about him. In the days that followed, he had fun and forgot about all his problem and his divorce. I fell in love again with him. When it came time for him to leave back to City X, I went to see him off and cried. I hated to see him leave. He promised to see me every time he could get a vacation. I couldn't wait for him to come so I could be with him. We would always have fun when we were together. One day he didn't show up like he said he would. I figured that he might have been busy. The days turned into months and I just forgot about it. Then I got a call one day from a lawyer in City X. The lawyer said that he had died in a car accident going to the airport. And that it took this long till everything was settled. It broke my heart. I was shocked about what took place. Now I knew why he didn't come that day. Again, I was broken-hearted. I cried that night, cried tears of sadness and heartache. Asking questions why did this happen to a kind guy like him? I gathered my things and went to City X for the reading of his will.
Of course, things were given to his family and his ex-wife. I finally got to meet her since the last time we met at the wedding. She explained to me how he was and how he always provided. But he was always unhappy. She would always try everything but she couldn't get him happy, as he was that night at their wedding. When the will was read, the one thing that was given to me was a diary. It was a dairy that of his life. I cried as it was given to me... As I flew on the plane I remembered the good times that we had together. I started reading the diary and what was written. The diary was started with the day we first met. I read on till I started to cry. The diary told of him saying that he had fallen in love with me that day I was broken-hearted. But he was too afraid to tell me what he had felt. That is why he was so quiet and liked to listen to me. It told of how he wanted to tell me so many times, but was too afraid to say anything. It told of when he went to City X and fell in love with another. How the happiest time he had was seeing me and dancing with me at the wedding. He said he imagined it was our wedding. How he was always unhappy till he had no choice but to divorce his wife. How the best time in his life was to read the letters written to him by me. Finally, the diary ended when it said, "today I will tell her I love her". It was the day he was killed. The day I was going to finally find out what was really in his heart.

If you love someone, don't wait till tomorrow to tell him/her. Maybe that next day will never come at all.

Virginity

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Shy guy

*this is my friend's story,not mine*

"I was round at Terry's. It was a great party. Loads of people were there. I was just standing around with my mate Steve and I see this girl over his shoulder. She smiles at me, right, so I give it the business. You know, I talk to Steve but every now and then laugh really loud and look at her again, smiling loads. She kept smiling back, so I moved in. We get talking and everything's going fine. She laughed at my jokes. Next thing I know she's looking at me all soppy and we kiss. Then it all got out of control. She's whispering to me to come upstairs - you know - and I said, 'you go on, I'll come in a minute, I've got to go to the loo first', or something.

"Anyway she goes off and Steve comes over. He's really excited, going on about 'taking my chances' and 'having it off'. I didn't know what to say. I mean I was really excited about the kiss still and he's saying that I must be a right stud to pull a girl like that. It is true, I have had lots of girlfriends but it doesn't mean I'm experienced. I mean, I'm really good at the chatting up and smooth-talking but I've never actually done it. Slept with someone. But I couldn't tell him that could I?

"Anyway I went upstairs, and found her in the bedroom, with all the lights off on top of a pile of coats. She had taken off half her clothes. I had been intending to say something. All the way upstairs I'd been thinking, 'tell her, tell her you're a virgin.' But how could I? I just knew she thought I wanted to have sex. I was thinking, 'I don't want it like this, what about protection and that?'

"It was awful, looking back, but I did it. I fumbled around and we were hardly talking so eventually, after a bit of wrestling I got it in and it lasted about 10 seconds. I just got dressed and left. I kept thinking, 'well I've done it but what could it have been like?'"

p/s Share your firts time experience by giving comment for this post.Thank you.

Having sex for the first time

There can be lot of pressure to lose your virginity - that is, to have sexual intercourse for the first time. Having sex with someone just because you want to lose your virginity, or because you think all your friends are doing it, is something you may regret later.

You might feel lots of anxieties, especially the first time you 'go all the way' - have sex. You may feel embarrassed about how you look without your clothes on, or worried about your privacy being disturbed. It's natural to feel some worries but good communication will really help to prevent you feeling embarrassed or worried. You should be able to talk to your partner about how you feel about having sex for the first time, and about any concerns you may have. Your partner might be worried, too. Being relaxed and able to share things with your partner will really ease the tension. And if you're too shy, or you're not able to talk about these things with your partner - then you probably shouldn't be having sex!

Having sexual intercourse - when a boy's hard penis goes inside a girl's vagina, or even just touches the outside of her vagina - is what leads to pregnancy. So, before having sexual intercourse you should think about whether you need to use contraception to prevent unwanted pregnancy, and condoms to prevent Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs).

Can a girl become pregnant the first time she has sexual intercourse?

Yes, a girl can become pregnant the first time she has sexual intercourse. So, you must use contraception the first time you have sexual intercourse, if you don't want to risk becoming a parent.

What about the law?

The age of consent, that is the age at which it is legal to have sex, depends on which country you are in, and in the United States the law is different in different states (see our teens, sex and the law page for further details).

In England and Wales, the law says it's illegal for a boy or a girl to have sex with a girl or a boy who is under sixteen.

Sex and love

For some people sexual feelings are bound up with love and close relationships. Some people think sex should only happen within marriage. For some people sex and love are two different things.

What is important is that you feel good about yourself and what you are doing, and that you keep yourself safe. Being safe means not only thinking about physical risks such as pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases (STDs). But also emotional risk such as the regret you may feel afterwards.

When are you ready for sex?

There is no absolute right age to start having sex. What matters is whether it is the right time for you. It also depends on what you mean by 'having sex'. There are many ways in which you can give and receive sexual pleasure without having sexual intercourse.

Giving each other massages, kissing and hugging can be very passionate. It's a way of sharing and showing love. For some people these activities can be more fulfilling than sexual intercourse.

You may feel that you are not ready emotionally. Being pushed into having sex could mean you regret it later on.

You get pressure from people talking about sex. You think, 'I've got to go and see what it's like'. It's hard, but you've got to resist and do what you want.

It's very important not to feel pressurised into having sex when you don't really want to. Just because your friends say they are 'doing it' doesn't mean they are.

Thinking through all the implications of having sex can be a useful way of helping you arrive at a decision. There are lots of reasons why people don't want to have sex. You may feel that you are not ready emotionally. Being pushed into having sex could mean you regret it later on. Some people have quite strong religious or cultural beliefs. Others just want to wait.

Some people call this decision to wait 'abstinence'. The decision to abstain from having sex can be either a long-term decision or a short-term one. Some people decide that they do not want to start having sex until they are married or in a significant long-term relationship. Other people may decide that having sex isn't the right thing for them at this particular time. Later on they may meet a person who they want and feel ready to have sex with. The decision whether to have sex or not is an important one. You should do what is right for you. It should be an informed decision, and not one based on fear or pressure from others.

But when a boy and girl do decide they want to have sexual intercourse, they should think about using a contraceptive unless they want to become parents. Gay men should also think about using condoms. Condoms can help stop infections like HIV as well as reducing the risk of getting pregnant.

If you're thinking about having sexual intercourse, why not read our ten question checklist to help you decide if you're ready?

How exactly do you have sexual intercourse? What position is best?

Sexual intercourse between a boy and a girl starts with both of them getting sexually excited as a result of kissing, stroking, caressing rubbing and touching each other. This sexual excitement will result in certain physical signs of sexual excitement. For the girl, the vagina, the sexual opening between the legs begins to moisten. The boy will get an erection, which means his penis will get bigger and harden. It is important that this stimulation goes on for long enough, because if the girl is not sexually excited enough, then her vagina will not be lubricated and moist enough, and it will be difficult for the boy's penis to enter the girl's vagina.

There are quite a number of different positions in which you can have sexual intercourse. One very common position involves both the boy and the girl lying down, with the boy lying on top

When the couple are both ready to have sexual intercourse (and this includes the boy putting a condom on if he is going to use one), it is probably easiest if either the boy or the girl uses their hand to guide the penis into the vagina. Then, once the penis is inside, the couple need to move their bodies so that the penis pushes into the vagina and then pulls partly out again. After a while this movement can lead to orgasm (coming or climaxing) for one or both of them.

There are quite a number of different positions in which you can have sexual intercourse. One very common position involves both the boy and the girl lying down, with the boy lying on top (This is often referred to as the missionary position). Alternatively the girl can be on top or both the boy and the girl can lie on their sides. It is probably easiest to choose one of these positions if you are having sexual intercourse for the first time. However, you can also have sexual intercourse with both the boy and the girl sitting down, one on the other, or both can be standing up. What is most important about whichever position you choose, is that it provides stimulation and enjoyment for both of you.

Will first time sex hurt?

Many boys and girls are concerned that it will hurt the first time they have sexual intercourse. It can hurt and some girls do bleed a little bit. The bleeding usually occurs because the girl has a hymen which breaks the first time she has sexual intercourse.

The hymen is a small piece of thin skin which goes across the opening of the vagina and protects it when she is young. It has some gaps in it where the blood can come out when she has her period. Sometimes a girl might already have broken her hymen without knowing about it. For example, this can happen as a result of playing sports or horse riding.